Nothing Like A Good Hand
by thesefingerprints
Summary: Crack AU. After quitting his job as a policeman, Light Yagami decided to pursue a job as a masseur instead. What started out as two-timing Misa Amane and Kiyomi Takada, it bloomed into an out of control fuck fest. How the hell did L get involved in this? And more women? And men? And L's ex-girlfriend? And why is Matsuda acting so strangely? Includes both straight and gay sex.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: I have no idea how this idea came to me, but once it invaded my mind, I just had to write it down. This fic is purely crack, so if there's some OCCness, well that might be the reason. Here's a warning: I can't write worth a damn. Not even a sex scene. I'm trying, okay? If you think I need to improve on something, just let me know, okay? Wait, where was I? Oh, yes._

_This fic has a LOT of sex. Both straight and gay. Oh, yeah did I mention Light screws anyone? Anyway, here's the first chapter!_

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note or its characters. They belong to _****Tsugumi Ohba and ****Takeshi Obata respectively.**

* * *

Chapter 1

"Mister Yagami, Miss Misa Amane is here." Light Yagami's secretary, Jun, said through the speaker.

"Good. Send her in." Light replied. Light Yagami took a deep breath. It had been five weeks since she last saw his girlfriend, Misa. Ever since she took the lead role as Hideki Ryuga's love interest in Hayashi's new movie, she had been extremely busy. But, once in a while, she drops by his massage parlor and they have. . . physical encounters. That's the only time they can have a regular boyfriend-girlfriend hangout. Not that Light was complaining, but, sometimes he wished that their encounters were more . . . romantic.

When was the last time they actually went out and just talk? He didn't remember.

Misa walked in through his office, interrupting his thoughts. "LIGHT!" She rushed toward him and hugged him tightly. "I missed you so much! You won't believe how exhausting my day was. Hayashi is super demanding! He made me kiss Hideki Ryuga at least 30 times! 30 takes! Can you believe that?" Misa said all of this while going around the room, taking off her purse and clothes. "So, Light, what do you have planned for me? Did you buy that relaxing lotion I told you about?" For the first time in her life, Misa realized that her boyfriend was not listening to her. "LIGHT!" She yelled at him.

Light snapped out of it. "Huh? Oh yeah, that sounds good." He mumbled.

Misa frowned. "Light, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, Misa. I just . . . miss you that's all."

Misa kept her frown. "You don't act like it. Is there something wrong with me, Light?" Her tone became desperate.

Light wrapped his arms around her and gave her a passionate kiss. He explored her mouth with his tongue slowly. When he heard her moan, he removed his mouth from hers.

"There's nothing wrong," He said in a silky voice, while stroking her cheek with his hand. "I was just thinking."

"Thinking about what?" Misa whispered.

"I'll tell you later." He kissed her lips again. "Right now, I just want to spend time with my girlfriend."

Misa blushed. "Okay."

What remained from Misa's clothing was removed slowly, her swaying her body towards the table. Light didn't noticed any of it. "So, Light, did you buy that relaxing lotion?" She asked again, rolling over on her stomach.

"I did, actually." Light rummaged in one of his cabinets near the door, taking out a small, green bottle. "Aloe Vera, right?"

"Mmm, yeah, that's the one." Misa stretched her body, arching her back. "Come on, Light. Don't keep me waiting." She said in a sing-song voice.

Light applied some of the lotion on his hands and rubbed them together. He walked towards the table and put his hands on Misa's back, using his thumbs to give firm, swirly strokes on her shoulder blades, slowly passing the top of his fingers through her spine. When he reached her lower back, he leaned down to give her a quick kiss there before gently raising her behind. "You seem to have a lot of tension right here. You must be really stressed."

Misa sighed. "You have no idea. I swear this movie is going to make me a mess." She turned over and grabbed Light's head to kiss him hard. "You can help me, right, Light?" While still pressing her lips to his, Misa unbuttoned Light's shirt and rubbed his chest. She trailed her lips on Light's cheek, then his neck, and kept kissing down on him until she landed on Light's abdomen.

The pants were off and Misa's hand traveled down his boxers, taking out his erection and stroking him slowly, smiling lovingly as she looked up at him. "Excited already? I'm just starting." Finally removing his boxers, she stroked him up and down, in a slow rhythm, making Light groan.

"Light, it really has been so long, hasn't it?" She wondered out loud, speeding up her pace. "I want you to make love to me. I really did miss you." She crawled herself up to Light's face and kissed him softly. Then, she lied down with her legs spread wide, her hand reaching down to rub her clitoris. "I'm so wet, Light. Don't you see how much I need you now?" She moaned.

Light grinned. Seeing Misa like this made his cock even harder. He missed seeing her so needy; it really was a turn on.

He didn't hesitate to spread her legs even wider; he guided himself near her entrance and pushed himself completely into the slit.

"Ahh!" Misa yelped. Feeling Light inside of her . . . there really wasn't any words for it. All she knew was that Light moving in and out of her was one of the best things she had ever experienced. She couldn't believe she made it without Light making love to her for a long time. She reminded herself that she was going to visit him every day. Screw her schedule! This was heaven.

Light thrust swiftly inside of Misa, gripping her hips with his hands. "Ugh, Misa," He groaned. "You are so tight. It's amazing." Thrust. "I can't believe I didn't have you for five weeks, you feel so good." He leaned down to kiss her lips hungrily, pressing his chest against hers.

They moved their bodies against each other for several minutes, until Light felt Misa's muscles clench around him. She was going to release first. _Good,_ he thought. Light's thrusts sped up, and he went even deeper inside of her, making Misa finally release.

"Ugh, Misa. Oh, fuck." He breathed heavily in Misa's ear. When he felt all of his cum expulsing inside of Misa, he pulled out. _Man,_ he thought, _I'm really glad I decided to work on a massage parlor. _They kissed passionately, before getting up and putting back their clothes on.

The unexpected sound of Misa crying startled Light.

Oh, shit, what did he do now? "Misa what's wrong? I didn't hurt you, did I?" He didn't like seeing her cry. He had absolutely no experience with girls bursting with tears in front of him. How can you make them shut up?

Misa sniffed. "Nothing, Light. It's just . . ." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "I've been scared. For us."

"What are you talking about, Misa?" He leaned his forehead against hers.

Misa seemed to think for a moment. "I'm fearing that you're finding someone else, Light."

Light backed away from her. "What? I will never do that to you, Misa! I love you, there's no one else but you." He tried not to feel the guilt that was starting grow in him. To be completely honest, Light was indeed having sex with someone else, but, Misa didn't have to know that. Misa once threatened him that if she saw him with another girl, she will kill her. Yes, it was better that she didn't find out.

"You promise me, Light? You promise me that you are not cheating on me?" Misa's eyes widened with tears.

"I promise. I'm not cheating on you." He lied. God, why was he feeling so guilty?

"You promise me that you are not having sex with Kiyomi Takada?" She asked firmly.

Light froze. How? How the hell did she guessed?

"Kiyomi is just a friend, Misa. She's like a sister to me." All the white lies were pouring out of him effortlessly. _Like a sister? More like your hot classmate!_ The voice in his head taunted him.

"And you are not having sex with L, right?"

Okay, now where did that come from? "L?" He sounded incredulously. "Why the hell would I sleep with L, Misa? He's my roommate, for Pete's sake! And a guy! I'm not gay, Misa!" He glared at her.

Misa's face turned pale. "I-I didn't mean to upset you, Light." She said in a small voice. "It's just that you seem so close to him—"

"Because we are friends, Misa. Of course I'm close to him. Not to mention, he was my partner before I quit the police." He narrowed his eyes at her. "Why are you so jealous of him? It was bad enough that you dislike Kiyomi, but now L? Do I have to clarify all my relationships to you?"

"PLEASE DON'T BE MAD AT ME!" Misa shrilled. "I have every right to be worried! You are a guy, Light. And guys do tend to stray when their girlfriends aren't around—"

"MISA! STOP!" He was shaking with fury. He grabbed her shoulders firmly. "I. Will. Never. Do. That. To. You. You hear me? You are the only woman for me." _Lies, lies, lies!_ He wanted to shut that voice up. "I wouldn't sleep with Kiyomi. Hell, I wouldn't even sleep with L. What made you even think I would sleep with a guy, Misa?" He snarled.

"Well, L does seem to look at you . . . strangely." Misa shrugged.

"That's just his face, he is weird after all." Light replied, rubbing his forehead. "Can we not discuss this anymore? Today I wanted to spend time with you, not to be bombarded by accusations."

Misa nodded. "Of course. I'm sorry I upset you. It won't happen again, I promise." With that, she kissed him softly.

Just when the kiss was becoming passionate, the speaker came to life.

"Mister Yagami, Miss Kiyomi Takada is here for her appointment."

"Got it, Jun." He spoke back.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE MASSAGING HER!" Misa screeched, her eyes looking wild.

Light rolled his eyes. "Misa, please. We are not having this discussion again. Kiyomi is just a friend and my client only. Besides, she already has a boyfriend. Why would I sleep with someone's girlfriend? That's just unethical." He hoped those words calmed her down.

Misa gave a defeated sigh. "I'm sorry for accusing you of cheating. I should have trusted you." She kissed his cheek. "I hope you are not mad at me."

"It's okay, Misa. It's normal that you feel this way. I would have been worried if you were with someone else, too."

"I will never do that, Light!" Now she was the one furious. "How dare you?" She pouted.

"I believe you." He chuckled and kissed her softly.

Misa checked her watch. "Damn it! I'm supposed to have a photoshoot with Hideki Ryuga in less than hour!" She gave Light a quick kiss. "I'm so sorry, Light. I hope I'll see you soon. Bye!" Misa said hurriedly, rushing to the door.

Light sighed. This day was going to be a long one.

At least he had something to look forward to: Having sex with Kiyomi Takada.

* * *

_A/N: Well, what do you think so far?_


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Well, I did promise, didn't I? Here's the second chapter of this Crack Fic. Once again, the writing is bad, the sex is bad, but I still want to know what you think. Enjoy!_

* * *

Chapter 2

When Misa Amane exited Light's office, she had to take a deep breath before going outside the massage parlor. _Light is not cheating on you. He wouldn't do that to you. You've been together for two years and he knows that you are a busy woman. Kiyomi is just a friend, he told you that. Besides, Kiyomi is an uptight bitch. He wouldn't have sex with her. You have to have more faith in him._

The entrance door's bell, interrupted Misa's thoughts and when she looked up, her thoughts about trusting Light evaporated like smoke from her mind.

_Well, speak of the devil._

Kiyomi Takada was wearing a fuchsia, belted pea coat over a tight lavender dress, with high leathered black boots. Her short, jet black hair was professionally straight and over-sized designer sunglasses covered her eyes. From the way she was standing right at the center of the parlor, it was as if she was demanding everyone to pay meticulous attention to her and that was exactly what she received. Some men were ogling at Kiyomi so hard, Misa swore that she saw drool coming from one of the men's mouth. There was even a woman fawning herself with a magazine, clearly flustered.

Misa wanted to kill Kiyomi Takada in the most torturous way imaginable.

Kiyomi swayed pass Misa and smirked at her, letting out a haughty chuckle. It took a lot of willpower for Misa to walk out the door and not choke Kiyomi's pretty throat.

_I'll show her. She thinks she won the battle, but at the end of the day, she's nothing more than a bitch. This isn't over. _

* * *

Light was cleaning the table that he and Misa had sex on a few minutes ago when Takada entered his office. When Light looked up, his jaw almost dropped. God, she really was beautiful. Sometimes he wondered how lucky he was for having a hot friend like her. Well, it wasn't a surprise that she befriended him. They were the hottest people in high school; it was simple logic. And the mere fact that he was sleeping with her, made everything better. Yes, he was with Misa, but Takada was more available these days. Light had _needs_. Was there anything wrong with that?

"Light, darling," Kiyomi kissed Light's cheek. "It's so good to see you."

"Mmm," Light didn't take a second to put his mouth on Takada's neck. "It's good to see you, too." He murmured against her neck, running his hands up and down her body.

"Light?"

"Yes?" Kiyomi's tone didn't faze him, not even a bit, and trailed his lips near her collarbone.

Exasperated by the lack of reaction, she grabbed Light's face and waved her other hand in front of him. Light turned confused on what she was doing, until he noticed a sparkle on her finger. It was an engagement ring.

"Did he . . ." Light cleared his throat, lost for words. "Did Mikami proposed?"

Takada beamed. "He did. I didn't expect him to take our relationship so seriously. I mean, he is normally so busy at work we hardly make love." She rolled his eyes. "But, now I know I mean a lot to him. He proposed, we drank champagne, and spent the night together after two months." Kiyomi removed her sunglasses, revealing eyes shining with tears. "Light, I'm going to be Mrs. Teru Mikami."

"That's . . . great." Light's voice cracked. He didn't know what to think. Did this mean that the sex was over? He didn't have any feelings for Takada—as far as he knew—and he shouldn't care if Takada was going to get married. But she was going to marry Teru Mikami, of all people. Light didn't like Mikami; last time he met him, he criticized Light for crossing his legs while he was sitting. Anyone who didn't like Light Yagami was a bad person on his list.

"Aw, Light," Takada stroked Light's cheek. "Just because I'm going to get married, it doesn't mean that I'm not finished with you. I still have three more months until the wedding, so . . ." Takada trailed off.

"So, what?" Light raised an eyebrow.

"I still can have you all to myself before then," Kiyomi suddenly pushed Light on the floor, unbuckled his pants, and massaged the erection that was developing through his boxers.

"Oh God, Takada . . ." Light said breathlessly.

"Shh," She took his cock out and began to stroke him. "You once told me to stay quiet when you fucked me a week ago and now I'm going to say the same thing to you," She squeezed the tip teasingly. "Hmm, you seemed to be excited already. Lucky me." She purred, and she straddled him.

Light's eyes widened. Since when was Takada so aggressive? Normally she would give him one of her excellent blowjobs (He really hated this thought, but Takada was better at it than Misa; Misa may be enthusiastic, but what Takada had was control) and then he would fuck her against the table or the wall. Nevertheless, it was really turning him on.

"Wait, what about your massage?" he asked her out of nowhere.

"Silly, Light, tonight I want a 'Happy Ending,'" She kissed him hard. "I really hate quickies as much as the next person, but I have a date with Mikami in less than half an hour and he promised me that I will choose the wedding cake," Takada rubbed her ass against Light's erected cock. "You understand, right?"

"Yes. Yes, I understand." Light couldn't formulate any thoughts in his head. His mind was heavily clouded with lust and he wanted Takada to hurry up and get inside of her.

Takada took off her panties, gripped Light's cock and slowly guided it to her entrance.

"Ah, Takada," Light gasped, when he felt Takada's tight walls surrounding his cock. He thrust upwards, making Takada bounce a little.

"Ah, Light," She rode him so intensely that Light's back hit the floor repeatedly. And oddly enough, he didn't mind the pain.

Their bodies were heaving up and down, grinding against each other. Takada occasionally nipped and sucked Light's neck and chest, moaning his name, while Light was panting frantically. When it was time for their release, Light held on to Takada's hips tightly, giving her a very deep thrust.

"OH, LIGHT, YES!" Takada gasped with pleasure, and climaxed. It didn't take long for Light to follow her lead, and their bodies lied down on the floor with exhaustion.

They were breathless, sweaty, and shameless.

"Wow, Light." Takada giggled. "That has to be our most intense sex so far." She kissed his lips softly. "You really are amazing."

"I know." Light said bluntly.

"And so modest," Takada rolled her eyes. "Well, Light, I have to go. I hope you don't miss me too much." She blew him a kiss, went searching for her panties, and put them on before leaving the door.

Light lied there on the ground until he heard his cellphone ring. It took a lot of effort to stand up but he got the cellphone on time and checked the last text message. It was from his roommate.

_Hey, Light. Matt brought me some movies for our Friday night, and I want you to check which one do you want to see._  
_-L_

Light turned off his phone. Friday night. Right. He couldn't believe that he almost forgot that tonight was their weekly movie night. Jun's voice from the speakers interrupted his thoughts.

"It's almost closing time. Do you still want another customer?"

"Yeah, no problem." Light spoke back.

When he will finish massaging (and just massaging!) his next customer, he will go back to his apartment, watch a movie with L and finally relax for the first time in a week.

It really was hard having sex with two women at the same time.

* * *

_A/N: Thoughts?_


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: Phew! I'm sorry for not updating for over a month, I was having a rather difficult time on my life, but, I promise it won't happen again. Okay, I know I said that OCCness was expected, but for some reason, I wanted the characters to be as IC as possible! Although I'm pretty sure I failed. Miserably. In this chapter L and Light interact as roommates. And then something happens. If I say anything else, it would be a spoiler. So, here it is, guys! The third chapter._

* * *

Chapter 3

"L, are you crazy?!"

"Mello, calm down, I'm not crazy. I'm just asking you to ask her what she's up to." L said seriously.

L was lying on the sofa, in the middle of the living room of the apartment. Two years ago, back when Light Yagami was still working with the NPA, L offered to share an apartment together. They were friends, they were partners, and they got along just fine. It would have been rude to say no. Although they were not partners anymore, they were still roommates. If your best friend offers to pay the rent, you don't leave!

When the phone rang a couple of minutes ago, L was working on his laptop, finishing up a new case. Mello called to have a nice conversation with the man he considered his big brother and great friend. Unfortunately for him, L had other ideas.

"You do realize that's almost stalker behavior, right, L?"

"I'm not being a stalker. I'm just curious. . . And besides, you're the one doing the questions, not me."

Mello sighed. They didn't even talk in the first place. What made him think he could just go to her house and ask, "Hey, how's your love life? Your ex was curious because he just can't seem to let it go!" "I better get something from this."

"What if I told you that if you get to talk to her, I'll give you a chocolate bar the size of your leg?" L paused dramatically. "With caramel filling." L hoped he could convince Mello with that offer.

Mello seemed to think about it. The size of his leg? Goddammit. "Fine," He said, his annoyance briefly disappearing through the phone. "I'll do it. But, don't ever ask me something like this ever again." Mello hanged up without saying goodbye.

"Well, thanks a lot!" L screamed at the phone, and threw himself on the sofa. Now that he thought about it, he was acting like a stalker. Ever since the breakup, he wouldn't stop thinking about her. She seemed to move on, why couldn't he?

While L wallowed on his misery, Light opened the door to let himself in and slammed the door in frustration. When he noticed L's head buried on a pillow, a smug smile crept on his lips. "Taking a nap already, L?"

L groaned. Why, why did he have to arrive at the wrong moment?

"Don't scowl at me, L, the least I want is your whining." He noticed the dropped phone on the floor. So," He threw himself on the sofa besides L. "Who were you talking to?"

He lifted his head up. "It was just Mello," He replied nonchalantly. "I was asking him a favor."

"About . . .?"

"None of your business, Light!" L snapped at him.

Light was slightly taken aback, but once he recuperated, he smirked perversely at L. "Ah-ha! It was a sexual favor, wasn't it? You do realize Mello is way younger than you, right?"

L glared at Light. "If you don't shut up, I'll swear I'm going to kick your face against a wall." L's tone warned Light that he should knock it off.

Light sighed. "I'm sorry. Today hasn't been a good day, that's all."

"I take it something bad happened at the massage parlor?" L asked, raising his thumb near his mouth.

"More or less. Misa came to visit me."

L raised an eyebrow. "Let me guess. Misa came into your office and you had sex with her even though your job was to only massage her."

Light winced. "God, you make it sound like I was doing something illegal."

"Highly unethical, that's what it is. So," L peered closer to Light. "Why did that make your day unfavorable? You are not having any problems with Misa, are you?

_Other than me sleeping with Kiyomi Takada behind her back, and her not trusting me as much anymore, our relationship seems to be fine and dandy!_ "Yes, it's fine. It's just . . . I miss her, that's all."

"Huh." L knew there was more than that, but he kept quiet, hoping Light would tell him eventually. Although knowing Light, he never will unless he was forced to. Today was not the day to do so.

"You do realize she's an actress, right? Of course she's not going to be around as much."

"Don't you think I know that?!" Light yelled at L, getting another glare in return. "I'm sorry." He rubbed his forehead. "Forgive me, okay? All I want is to watch a movie with you and not think at all."

"Light Yagami not thinking?" L snorted. "That doesn't sound like you at all. But if you insist," He stood up to get a box full of movies from his desk. "Here. These are the movies Matt brought for me."

"About time," Light murmured, and examined all of them carefully. "Hmm, let's see . . . Romantic comedy . . . another romantic comedy . . . another romantic comedy . . . comedy . . ." Light was getting irritated by the second. Was Matt mocking him? ". . . Romantic comedy . . . musical . . . fucking musical . . . Ah-ha!" Light grabbed the movie tightly and his voice went up a few octaves when he said, "Horror! That's exactly what I was waiting for!"

L rolled his eyes. Of course, what else? "Why do you always pick a horror movie?"

"Huh? You rather watch a romantic comedy?" Light teased and threw L a movie that had a man sitting with two women as a cover. "This movie has Tomoko Tabata in it. Since you rather watch that—?

"Are you kidding me?" L scoffed, throwing the movie back at him. "I don't want to watch a cheesy movie about a guy who can't decide between two sisters!" Although I didn't mind when I saw it with her . . .

"So you have seen it." Light's teasing smile grew even wider.

L's face grew red. Ah, if only Light had a camera for this precise moment. L being embarrassed was a thing of beauty. "Let's just watch your movie."

"I thought you would never ask."

* * *

"It was you all along?"

"That's right. And now I'm going to make sure nobody finds out about this. I'm sorry Mrs. Nagata, but I may have to kill you."

"No! Get away from me!"

"Stop screaming. This will only hurt a bit."

"AH!"

On the screen, the killer raised his knife, slashing it against the woman's neck, creating a thin, horizontal line of blood. Meanwhile, outside the screen, the two men peered at the scene before them. The brunet was eyeing the screen with utter fascination while the raven inspected with utter indifference.

The credits rolled, indicating that the movie was over.

"Damn," Light whistled. "That was a really cruel ending."

"Yeah. Cruel." L said in a monotone.

Light turned to look at him. "You didn't enjoy it, did you?"

"No." L stretched his arms over his head. "It was predictable, boring, and the acting was hideous." He rubbed his thumb against his lips. "Your choice of movies is getting terrible."

"God, L, shut up." Light didn't take his comment seriously. It amused him when L was like this.

"Next time, choose a better movie."

"Like the movie about the guy choosing between two sisters?" Light's teasing tone came back.

"Now it's your turn to shut up." L groaned.

"Ugh, you are being so annoying today, L. When was the last time you had sex?" Light asked suddenly.

"Excuse me?" L's eyes widened.

He meant to insult him, to make fun of him. But, now that he thought about it, it wouldn't hurt to ask. "When was the last you had sex?" He repeated.

"Why do you want to know that?" L lifted one eyebrow.

"I'm just curious, that's all. You don't have to answer it." Light shrugged.

L sighed. "If you must know, I haven't had sex for about . . ." He stopped to think about it. "4 months and two weeks."

The tension in the air was almost toxic for how heavy it was. Light turned to L with disbelief.

". . . L?"

"Yes, Light?" L didn't know what he was thinking.

"Are you trying to tell me that you haven't slept with someone since Halle Lidner broke up with you?" he said incredulously.

"What's your point?" L murmured.

"No wonder you've been irritating these past couple of months. You're still not over Halle. Unbelievable."

L averted his eyes away from Light's. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"L, she's with Rester. You can't do anything about that."

"Actually," L smiled brightly. "Halle broke up with him two days ago."

"And makes you think she wants to come back with you?" Light scoffed at him.

"I actually had Mello trying to contact her—"

"Stop!" Light interrupted. "L, as much as it pains me to say this—and believe me, it does—Halle has moved on. You have to do the same."

L sighed. "I suppose you're right."

"You know what you need?" Light put a comforting hand on L's shoulder.

"I need to get laid?" L rolled his eyes.

"Well, yes, but I was actually talking about relaxing. I know exactly what you need." Light stood up and went to the kitchen.

"What are you planing, Light?" L stood up too, and followed him.

"I'm making you a drink. I usually make one of these when I'm stressed from work." He said, taking out a bottle of vodka from the counter, and cubes of ice, pineapple juice and pomegranate juice from the refrigerator.

"You are expecting me to drink _alcohol_?" L said skeptically, glaring at Light.

"This is just to relax you, L." He opened the fridge again. "I could add strawberry juice instead if you don't like pineapple."

"Wow, you really do care." L deadpanned.

Light rolled his eyes. "Please do this for me. I really want you to relax."

"How can I be relaxed if I won't know what I'm doing?" L hissed at Light.

"You know what? What if I drink, too? Would that make you more comfortable?"

L raised a thumb to his mouth in thought. "Fine. You drink with me. But, this is the only time I will get drunk. Got it?"

"Got it." Light mixed the vodka and the strawberry juice for L and then made his drink with the pineapple and pomegranate juice. L took the drink and sipped it tentatively.

"This isn't so bad."

"I told you so." Light gave him a genuine smile. "How about we make a toast?"

"A toast?" L repeated.

"Yeah." Light raised his glass. "To women. They are a pain in the ass, but what can you do about it? Cheers!" He clanked his glass against L's and drank it.

"Cheers." L took another sip and this time, he finished it in one gulp. "Mm. Light, can I have another one?"

"Get it yourself," Light teased.

"Please? You will become my best friend if you do." He teased back.

"Fine," Light poured him another glass. "There. Now that think about it, I need another one, too." And that's what he did.

* * *

Several minutes later,the counter was clustered with several glasses and two drunken men who were still drinking. If any of them didn't take precaution, one of the glasses could shatter and create a hazard for bare feet. And who needed that right now?

L drank his eighth drink quickly. "Woah." He tried to stand up, but his legs felt like jelly. "I guess that's how being tipsy feels like." He hiccupped. "Hmm, I actually want another one." L walked towards the cabinet but his legs wouldn't allow it.

"L, you idiot." Light steadied him and raised him on the counter. "What are you doing? You are drunk."

"And you are not?" L giggled.

Light looked at him skeptically and then burst out with laughter. "I guess I am drunk as well." L was immobile for a second but he was quickly infected with Light's good mood.

"Man, we are so wasted. " L slurred against Light's chest.

"We sure are." Light let out another giggle. "We are really, really drunk."

The laughter lasted for almost half an hour.

* * *

Light heard an alarm ringing. _Why is L's alarm in my room?_ He tried to stand up to turn it off until he realized his head was aching._ How many drinks did I get?_ And then he realized something else: He was completely naked._What the hell happened last night? And more importantly, where the hell is L?_

"L! Where are you?" Light yelled.

"I'm in the kitchen!" L yelled back.

Huh, so he was awake for a while. When he entered the kitchen with his robe on, he noticed that L was reading a newspaper and had breakfast prepared on the table.

"L, what's going on?" Light said groggily.

"Ah, you finally stood up. Come on, Light, sit. I made some breakfast." He pointed at the chair across the table.

"L, what the hell happened last night?" This was becoming really strange. Since when was L the one who made breakfast? And why was he speaking so pleasantly?

L gave him a pitifully look. "Don't you remember? We had sex."


End file.
